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愚人英語(yǔ)笑話5個(gè)
愚人英語(yǔ)笑話一：
saleswoman女售貨員
After being with her all evening, the man couldn't take another minute with his blind date. Earlier, he had secretly arranged to have a friend call him to the phone so he would have an excuse to leave.When he returned to the table, he lowered his eyes, put on a grim expression and said, "I have some bad news. My grandfather just died.""Thank heavens," his date replied. "If yours hadn't, mine would have had to!"
和盲約對(duì)象呆了一晚上后，男人再也受不了了。他事先安排了個(gè)朋友給他打電話，這樣他就能借故先離開了。當(dāng)他回到桌邊，他垂下眼睛，裝出一副陰沉的表情，說(shuō)：“有個(gè)不幸的消息，我的祖父剛剛?cè)ナ懒恕?rdquo;“謝天謝地!”他的約會(huì)對(duì)象說(shuō)，“如果你的祖父不死，我的祖父就得死了!”
Teacher of Physical Education: Have you ever seen mixed doubles, boys?
Nick: Yes, sir. Quite often. I saw it even last night。
Teacher: Please tell us something about it。
Nick: Oh, sorry, sir. My father always says, 'Domestic shame should not be published.'
愚人英語(yǔ)笑話二：
混合雙打
體育老師：孩子們，你們見過(guò)男女混合雙打嗎?
尼克：見過(guò)，老師，經(jīng)常見。就在昨天夜里我還見過(guò)呢?
老師：你給大家講講當(dāng)時(shí)的情形吧。
尼克：啊，對(duì)不起，老師。我爸爸常說(shuō)，”家丑不可外揚(yáng)。“
NOTE
have you ever seen…你見過(guò)…
Domestic shame should not be published。家丑不可外揚(yáng)
愚人英語(yǔ)笑話三：
一位車上的列車員剛發(fā)出信號(hào)讓火車啟動(dòng)，這時(shí)他看見一位很漂亮的姑娘站在站臺(tái)上一節(jié)打開的車廂門旁邊，跟車廂里另一位漂亮姑娘在說(shuō)話。
“快點(diǎn)，小姐!”他喊道：“請(qǐng)把門關(guān)上。”
“噢，我還沒(méi)有和妹妹吻別呢。”她回答道。
“請(qǐng)把門關(guān)上好了，”列車員說(shuō)：“其余的事由我負(fù)責(zé)。”
I'll See to the Rest
A guard was about to signal his train to start when he saw an attractive girl standing on the platform by an open door, talking to another pretty girl inside the carriage。
"Come on, miss!" he shouted. "Shut the door, please!"
"Oh, I just want to kiss my sister goodbye," she called back。
"You just shut that door, please," called the guard, "and I'll see to the rest."
愚人英語(yǔ)笑話四：
One day a visitor from the city came to a small rural area to drive around the country roads, see how the farms looked, and perhaps to see how farmers earned their living. The city man saw a farmer in his yard, holding a pig up in his hands, and lifting it so that the pig could eat apples from an apple tree. The city man said to the farmer," I see that your pig likes apples, but isn't that quite a waste of time?" The farmer replied," What's time to a pig?"
一天，有一個(gè)城市里的游客來(lái)到一個(gè)小鄉(xiāng)村，在鄉(xiāng)間路上開著車，想看看農(nóng)莊是什么樣子，也想看看農(nóng)夫怎樣種田過(guò)日子。這位城里人看見一位農(nóng)夫在宅后的草地上，手中抱著一頭豬，并把它舉得高高的，好讓它能夠吃到樹上的
蘋果。城里人對(duì)農(nóng)夫說(shuō)，"我看你的豬挺喜歡吃蘋果的，但是，這不是很浪費(fèi)時(shí)間嗎?"那位農(nóng)夫回答說(shuō)，"時(shí)間對(duì)豬有什么意義?"
愚人英語(yǔ)笑話五：
誰(shuí)的父親更強(qiáng)壯
威爾和比爾在為誰(shuí)的父親更強(qiáng)壯而爭(zhēng)吵。威爾說(shuō)：“喏，你知道太平洋嗎?就是我爸爸為它挖的洞。”
比爾不屑一顧：“噢，那沒(méi)什么。你知道死海嗎?那是我爸爸殺死的。”
Will and Bill were quarrelling about whose father was the stronger man. Will said, “Well, you know the Pacific Ocean ? My father's the one who dug the hole for it。”
Bill wasn't impressed, “Well, that's nothing. You know the Dead Sea ? My father'
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