簡(jiǎn)單英語(yǔ)幽默笑話

　　簡(jiǎn)單英語(yǔ)幽默笑話一：Where It Should Be Plugged

　　A mother is very good at using every chance to educate his son, who was only three years old. One day, she took a plug and said to her son, " Look, there are two pieces of copper, so it must be plugged in a place where there are two holes. Where do you think it should be plugged?" She waited for an answer expectfully .

　　"Plug in nose." is the answer.

　　一位母親十分善于利用每一個(gè)機(jī)會(huì)對(duì)孩子進(jìn)行教育。她的.兒子只有三歲。一天，她拿著一個(gè)插頭對(duì)兒子說(shuō)：“看，這里有兩個(gè)銅片，那它一定要插在有兩個(gè)孔的地方。你說(shuō)它應(yīng)該插在哪兒呢?”母親期待著兒子的回答。

　　“插在鼻子里!”兒子回答說(shuō)。

　　簡(jiǎn)單英語(yǔ)幽默笑話二：?jiǎn)枂?wèn)你自己的吧

　　Ask Your OwnIt was a cold，raw day at Washington.Champ Clark was discussing the gamins of the cities with an English visitor.The latter expatiated on the wit of the London type of the genius.Clark declared that if the Englishman were to ask any Washington street urchin any question，the urchin would make anaptreply.They sallied forth. “What time is it，Bub?They tell me you can tell time by your nose，”said the visitor to the first newsboy they met. “Ask your own，mister，mine ain't run nin’，”was the reply.

　　這是華盛頓的一個(gè)陰冷天。錢(qián)普·克拉克正和一個(gè)來(lái)訪的英國(guó)人討論城市的流浪兒，英國(guó)人詳細(xì)地?cái)⑹鲋鴤惗厥教觳诺臋C(jī)智�？死�克宣稱，要是對(duì)方向華盛頓街上任何一個(gè)兒童提任何問(wèn)題，那孩子都會(huì)對(duì)答如流。他們便出發(fā)了。 “什么時(shí)候了，小兄弟?人們說(shuō)你能用鼻子報(bào)時(shí)。” 回答是：“先生，問(wèn)問(wèn)你自己的吧，的不在走呢。”

　　簡(jiǎn)單英語(yǔ)幽默笑話三：What Was It She Wanted?

　　A store manager heard a clerk tell a customer.“No，ma’am， we haven't had any for a while， and it doesn't look asif we'll be getting soon.” Horrified，the manager came runningover to the customer and said，“Of course， we'll have somesoon， We placed an order last week.” Then the manager drewthe clerk aside：“Never， never， never say we are out of anything—say we've got it on order and it's coming. Now whatwas it she wanted?” “Rain.” said the clerk.

　　一個(gè)商店經(jīng)理聽(tīng)見(jiàn)一個(gè)店員對(duì)顧客說(shuō)：“不，夫人，這會(huì)兒沒(méi)有，一時(shí)半會(huì)兒看來(lái)也不會(huì)有。”經(jīng)理驚恐萬(wàn)分地跑到顧客跟前說(shuō)：“當(dāng)然，馬上就會(huì)有的。我們上周訂了貨。”然后經(jīng)理把店員拉到一邊：“千萬(wàn)，千萬(wàn)，千萬(wàn)不要說(shuō)我們沒(méi)有什么——說(shuō)我們已經(jīng)訂了貨，貨馬上就到�，F(xiàn)在你說(shuō)她要買(mǎi)什么?” “雨，”店員說(shuō)。

　　簡(jiǎn)單英語(yǔ)幽默笑話四：Older Goats in America美國(guó)老羊

　　A group of Americans were traveling by tour bus through Holland. As they stopped at a cheese farm, a young guide led them through the process of cheese making, explaining that goats' milk was used.

　　She showed the group a lovely hillside where many goats were grazing. These, she explained, were the older goats put out to pasture when they no longer produced. She then asked, "What do you do with your older goats in America?"

　　A spry old gentleman answered, "They send us on bus tours!"

　　一群美國(guó)人乘長(zhǎng)途汽車(chē)在荷蘭旅游。他們?cè)谝粋�(gè)奶酪場(chǎng)停下來(lái)。一位年輕的導(dǎo)游帶他們參觀了奶酪制作的全過(guò)程，解釋說(shuō)用的是羊奶。 她指給這群人一個(gè)美麗的山坡，山坡上許多羊在吃草。對(duì)這些，她解釋說(shuō)，是放逐草地的老羊，它們已不能再產(chǎn)奶。她然后問(wèn)道：“在美國(guó)你們?cè)鯓犹幚砝涎蚰?”

　　一位活潑的老紳士回答說(shuō)：“他們讓我們乘車(chē)旅行!”

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