經(jīng)典爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話

時(shí)間：2024-10-20 06:03:28 英語(yǔ)笑話我要投稿

精選經(jīng)典爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話

　　電腦問(wèn)題

精選經(jīng)典爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話

　　I had been doing Tech Support for Hewlett-Packard's DeskJet division for about a month when I had a customer call with a problem I just couldn't solve. She could not print yellow. All the other colors would print fine, which truly baffled me because the only true colors are cyan, magenta, and yellow. I had the customer change ink cartridges，delete and reinstall the drivers. Nothing worked. I asked my coworkers for help; they offered no new ideas. After over two hours of troubleshooting, I was about to tell the customer to send the printer in to us for repair when she asked quietly, "Should I try printing on a piece of white paper instead of yellow paper?"

　　我在惠普公司打印機(jī)部做技術(shù)支持工作已經(jīng)有一個(gè)月了，有一天我接到一位客戶的電話，她的問(wèn)題我沒辦法解決。她的問(wèn)題是：打印機(jī)不能打出來(lái)黃色，但是其它顏色都正常。這讓我覺得很納悶，因?yàn)槿褪撬{(lán)、紅、黃。我建議客戶更換墨盒、刪了驅(qū)動(dòng)程序然后重新安裝，但是都沒有效果。我咨詢同事們，他們也不知道該怎么辦。經(jīng)過(guò)兩個(gè)多小時(shí)的交涉，我打算讓客戶把打印機(jī)寄給我們，這時(shí)候她平靜地說(shuō)了一句：“我是不是應(yīng)該把這張黃紙扔了換一張白紙?jiān)俅蛴≡囋嚒?rdquo;

　　誰(shuí)欠誰(shuí)錢

　　A lawyer's dog, running about unleashed, beelines for a butcher shop and steals a roast. Butcher goes to lawyer's office and asks, "If a dog running unleashed steals a piece of meat from my store, do I have a right to demand payment for the meat from the dog's owner?" The lawyer answers, "Absolutely." "Then you owe me $8.50. Your dog was loose and stole a roast from me today." The lawyer, without a word, writes the butcher a check for $8.50. Several days later, the butcher opens the mail and finds an envelope from the lawyer: $250 due for a consultation.

　　律師的狗，沒有拴而到處閑逛，它來(lái)到一家肉店，偷走了一塊烤肉。店主來(lái)到律師的辦公室，問(wèn)道“如果一條沒栓的狗從我的商店里偷了塊肉，我有權(quán)利從狗的主人那里要回?fù)p失嗎?律師答道：“完全可以”，“那你欠我 8.50美元，你的狗沒栓而且今天從我的店里頭了塊肉”，律師什么都沒說(shuō)，馬上給他寫了一張支票。一些天后，店主打開郵箱，發(fā)現(xiàn)一封來(lái)自律師的信，信上寫道：咨詢費(fèi)250美元。

　　打氣筒里面的氣

　　The neighbor often borrowed my inflator.

　　One day, my four-year-old daughter suddenly told me: "Papa, what shall we do if the air of our inflator is used up?"

　　鄰居經(jīng)常借我家的打氣筒。

　　有一天，4歲的女兒突然告訴我說(shuō)：“爸爸，我們的打氣筒里面的氣用完了怎么辦?”

　　視情況而定

　　One day a doctor went to a store and bought a pair of shoes. Before he left the shoes counter, he asked the salesgirl: "How long will this pair of shoes last?"

　　"It depends. If you don t use it, the shoes will never wear out."

　　Several days later the salesgirl fell ill and went to a hospital. And the happened to be the customer she served.

　　After the girl got the prescription from the doctor, she asked: "How soon will I get better with the medicine?"

　　"It depends." The doctor answered, "If you don t use it, you will never get better."

　　一天，一位醫(yī)生到鞋店買了雙鞋。他在離開柜臺(tái)之前，問(wèn)售貨員：“這雙鞋能穿多長(zhǎng)時(shí)間?”

　　“視情況而定。如果您不穿它，那它們永遠(yuǎn)也不會(huì)壞。”

　　幾天后，這位售貨員病了，去醫(yī)院看病。這位醫(yī)生碰巧是那位顧客。

　　當(dāng)售貨員拿了處方后，問(wèn)道：“吃了這藥，我的病多長(zhǎng)時(shí)間才能好呀?”

　　“視情況而定。”醫(yī)生說(shuō)，“如果你不吃藥，你的病永遠(yuǎn)也好不了。”

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