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精選英語(yǔ)笑話匯集
智力缺陷
"Would you mind telling me, Doctor," Bob asked, "how you detect a mental deficiency in somebody who appears completely normal?" "Nothing is easier," he replied, "You ask him a simple question which everyone should answer with no trouble. If he hesitates, that puts you on the track." "Well, what sort of question?" "Well, you might ask him, 'Captain Cook made three trips around the world and died during one of them. Which one?' " Bob thought for a moment, and then said with a nervous laugh, "You wouldn't happen to have another example would you? I must confess I don't know much about history."
“醫(yī)生,你能不能告訴我,”鮑勃問(wèn),“對(duì)于一個(gè)看上去很正常的人,你是怎樣判斷出他有智力缺陷的呢?”“再?zèng)]有比這容易的了,”醫(yī)生回答,“問(wèn)他一個(gè)簡(jiǎn)單的問(wèn)題,簡(jiǎn)單到所有人都知道答案,如果他回答得不干脆,那你就知道是怎么回事了。”“那要問(wèn)什么樣的問(wèn)題呢?”“嗯,你可以這樣問(wèn),‘庫(kù)克船長(zhǎng)環(huán)球旅行了三次,但是在其中一次的途中他去世了,是哪一次呢?’”鮑勃想了一會(huì)兒,緊張的回答道,“你就不能問(wèn)另外一個(gè)問(wèn)題嗎?坦率地說(shuō),我對(duì)歷史了解的不是很多。”
無(wú)聊的課
One of my favorite teachers at Southeast Missouri State University in Cape Girardeau is known for his droll sense of humor. Explaining his ground rules to one freshman class, he said, "Now I know my lectures can often be dry and boring, so I don't mind if you look at your watches during class. I do, however, object to your pounding them on the desk to make sure they're running!"
在開普吉拉多市的東南密蘇里州立大學(xué)上學(xué)的時(shí)候,我喜歡的幾個(gè)老師之中有一個(gè)以他的幽默感而出名。給新生上頭一節(jié)課,他給學(xué)生解釋在他課上的紀(jì)律,他說(shuō):“我知道我的課經(jīng)常會(huì)很枯燥乏味,所以我并不介意你們?cè)谡n上看表。然而,我堅(jiān)決不允許你們把表重重的摔在課桌上,以此來(lái)檢查你的表是不是還在走。”
開卷考試
On the day of our final exam at my Community College in Santa Maria, Calif., we heard that the bookstore had changed its policy and would buy back our business-management textbooks. Before class, several of us dashed over to the store and sold our books. We were seated and waiting for the test when our professor announced that considering the difficulty of the final, it would be an open-book exam.
我在加利福尼亞的圣瑪麗亞市一所社區(qū)大學(xué)讀書。期末考試那天,聽說(shuō)書店在回購(gòu)我們的工商管理課本?荚嚽埃覀儙讉(gè)趕忙跑到書店把書賣了,隨后,我們坐在教室里等著考試。這時(shí)候教授宣布:考慮到試題的難度,今天的考試我們決定開卷。
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