英語(yǔ)小笑話大全爆笑精選

　　1、Our university newspaper runs a weekly question feature. Recently, the question was: "Whose autograph would you most want to have, and why?" As expected, most responses mentioned music or sports stars, or politicians. The best response came from a freshman, who said, "The person who signs my diploma."

　　我們大學(xué)的校報(bào)開辦了一個(gè)每周一問(wèn)的專欄。上周的問(wèn)題是：“你最想要什么人的簽名?為什么?”和預(yù)計(jì)的一樣，大部分的回答都是歌星、體育明星或者政治家。但是，最優(yōu)秀的答案來(lái)自一個(gè)一年級(jí)新生，他說(shuō)：“在我畢業(yè)證上簽字的那個(gè)人。”

　　2、A man was driving to work when a truck ran a stop sign ... hit his car broadside, and knocked him cold. Passerbys pulled him from the wreck and revived him. He began a terrific struggle and had to be tranquilized by the medics. Later, when he was calm, they asked him why he struggled so. He said, "I remember the impact, then nothing. I woke up on a concrete slab in front of a huge, flashing 'Shell' sign. And somebody was standing in front of the 'S.'

　　有個(gè)人開車行駛在上班的路上，一輛卡車闖紅燈從側(cè)面撞上了他的車，當(dāng)時(shí)他就不省人事了。路旁的行人把他從車?yán)锢�出�?lái)并喚醒他。剛一醒過(guò)來(lái)，他就拼命的掙扎著，最后不得不用了藥物才讓他鎮(zhèn)靜下來(lái)。過(guò)了一會(huì)兒，他平靜了，別人問(wèn)他為什么要這么恐怖的掙扎，他說(shuō)：“被撞之后我就什么都不知道了，當(dāng)我醒過(guò)來(lái)，我發(fā)現(xiàn)我躺在了路邊，前面是一個(gè)巨大的廣告牌上面閃爍著‘殼牌’，但是有個(gè)人擋住了那個(gè)“S”。”

　　3、Teacher: Where does God live?

　　老師：上帝住哪兒?

　　Student: I think he lives in our bathroom.

　　學(xué)生：我想他應(yīng)該住我家浴室。

　　Teacher: Why do you say that?

　　老師：為什么這么說(shuō)?

　　Student: Well, every morning my daddy bangs on the door and says, "God, are you still in there?"

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