英語(yǔ)幽默笑話小報(bào)
So the new pilot thought about it. He was a little bit skeptical, but finally he said, "OK, since you did it last year, I guess this year we can do it again." Then he loaded the two buffalos and a few other animals in, and the plane took off. Five minutes later, it crashed in a neighboring area. The three men climbed out and looked around, and one hunter said to the other, "Where do you think we are now?" The second one surveyed the area and said, "I think we're about one mile to the left of the place we crashed last year."
因?yàn)樗麄冞@樣抗議,所以那個(gè)新飛行員想了一想后,盡管還是有點(diǎn)存疑,最后還是妥協(xié)說(shuō):“好吧!如果去年可以做到,今年應(yīng)該也可以。”所以他裝了兩頭水牛和一些其他的動(dòng)物。結(jié)果飛機(jī)起飛五分鐘后,就墜落在鄰近的地方。這3個(gè)人從飛機(jī)爬出來(lái)看了看四周,其中一個(gè)獵人對(duì)另一個(gè)說(shuō):“你認(rèn)為我們現(xiàn)在在哪兒?” 那個(gè)人瞧了一下,說(shuō):“我想大概距離去年墜機(jī)的地方西邊一英哩遠(yuǎn)!”
Pig or Witch 豬還是女巫
A man is driving up a steep, narrow mountain road. A woman is driving down the same road. As they pass each other, the woman leans out of the window and yells "PIG!!" The man immediately leans out of his window and replies, "WITCH(女巫)!!" They each continue on their way, and as the man rounds the next corner, he crashes into a pig in the middle of the road. If only men would listen.
一個(gè)男人在一條陡峭狹窄的山路上駕車,一個(gè)女人相向駕車而來(lái)。他們相遇時(shí),那個(gè)女的從窗中伸出頭來(lái)叫到:“豬!!”那個(gè)男的立即從窗中伸出頭來(lái)回敬道:“女巫!!”他們繼續(xù)前行。這個(gè)男的.在下一個(gè)路口轉(zhuǎn)彎時(shí),撞上了路中間的一頭豬。要是這個(gè)男的能聽懂那個(gè)女人的意思就好了。
While proudly showing off his new apartment to friends,a college student led the way into the den. "What is the big brass gong and hammer ford "One of his friends asked."That is the talking clock.”the man replied.“How does it work!”
"Watch,”the man said and proceeded to give the gong an ear shattering pound with the hammer. Suddenly,someone screamed from the other side of the wall,“Knock it off,you idiots It’s two 0’clock in the morning”
一個(gè)學(xué)生帶他朋友們參觀他的新公寓,甚是得意。“那個(gè)大銅鑼和錘子是干什么用的?”他的一個(gè)朋友問(wèn)他。“那玩意兒厲害了,那是一個(gè)會(huì)說(shuō)話的鐘”,學(xué)生回答。“這鐘怎么工作的?”
他的朋友問(wèn)。“看著,別眨眼了”,那學(xué)生走上前一把操起銅鑼和錘子,拼命地敲了一下,聲音震耳欲聾。突然,他們聽到隔壁墻那邊有人狂叫,“別敲了,你這白癡!現(xiàn)在是凌晨?jī)牲c(diǎn)鐘了!”
Give up your seat to a lady
Little Johnny says "Mom, when I was on the bus with Daddy this morning, he told me to give up my seat to a lady."
"You've done the right thing," says Mommy.
"But Mommy, I was sitting on daddy's lap."
給女士讓座
小強(qiáng)尼說(shuō):“媽媽,今天早上和爸爸在公車上時(shí),他叫我讓座給一位女士。”
媽媽說(shuō):“你做得很對(duì)呀。”
“但是,媽媽,我是坐在爸爸膝蓋上的。”
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